Wednesday, September 25, 2019

Saturday, August 31, 2019

Torture

It is known by the seers of the void that they will stop at nothing to move together through the fight. Though the chances spit on their hope, they do not hinder the being of Truth. Appeasing mind with a word stream does nothing for the trapped emotions, which sizzle invisibly and pull the strings within, starkening the yearning void inside. Fix me or kill me, he feels. The middle ground is torture.

Sunday, August 25, 2019

Friday, July 12, 2019

Steward

Women steward sex.
Men steward... power? Willpower? Direction?

Turns

There are no turns in dance. It's real-time.

Craving

Craving engenders itself.
Obtained, another one takes its place.
Fulfilled, it is replaced by fear of losing it.

Blade

Not a blade of grass grows or waves for me. Purpose is a concept immaterial.

Monday, June 10, 2019

None

Musts are untrue
No hardness is absolute
What may seem unavoidable
Are only grooves, trenches
Where gravity seduces our flow to caress

Yet choice can climb any slope
Guide any flow
With focus, a wide flow condenses
Into any direction and form

No canyon is unscalable
All space can be traversed
Such is this weave of nothing
That we play

Musts

Musts may feel comfortable to some.
They demarcate clear paths,
Defer authority to another
Automate choice and will

The pangs of failure are dulled by the sheltered victim
The pleasures along the way, often known and enjoyed
Musts bound the experience space
Oh, can these borders congeal

Feels simple to stay by the swimming pool edges
The rest may feel wild and unknown
Yet the self yearns an ergodic journey
Not until one lets go
Can one experience the ocean

Friday, June 7, 2019

foreign care

I want you to see me
and
I want you to not know that I care that you see me

eyes close

Saturday, June 1, 2019

Chain

Being comes into awareness
Awareness sprouts attention
Attention weaves attraction
Attraction fuels desire
Desire becomes want
Want is spoken as need
Need engenders should
Should congeals into must
Must constrain our paths
Constraints chain us
To what is not

Remember

Remember
My center

Sunday, May 26, 2019

Learned

Listen
Unhide
Straighten your velcro hooks, pull them towards you. It prevents lint from getting stuck on them.
Bring in your energy strands, cover yourself with them with a smooth surface like glass. It prevents your energy from getting stuck on others' hooks.

Thursday, May 23, 2019

oh look

oh look
an expectation

star and moon

star and moon
we help each other
through ages, we forgot that here we are
on a plane
and we can reach out and help. feels good

Sunday, May 19, 2019

Infinity

A dancer in infinity makes no difference. Dance makes walls and floors to flow and fly freely within.

Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Tuesday, March 19, 2019

yearns

yearns:
- pride wants to show off. to prove to them, to show them I'm right.
- wants to be admired. to be seen, to be the center of attention, the source of awe.
- wants to defend myself vigorously against injustice. With strength and with right. It feels it deserves redemption.
- wants to feel care, attention from others.
- wants a female partner in play. A mutual attention, mutual care.

Saturday, March 16, 2019

sunny

sunny sadness
survives
softly, silently
suffocates
simplicity
sees such sorrow
subtly shrouded
savage soul
unwanted

Friday, March 15, 2019

if

oh what if we dropped these masks
what if we let
what if we felt
what truly there is
here is
HERE is
and let the rain
wash the rest away
the dust we still care for
the layers we thought ours
we thought us
but are as transient
as this thought

Tuesday, March 12, 2019

Sweet

Such a sweet tear
shed by my Heart
The sweetest, softest message
of surrendered Love

A child made honey
as fresh, as pure
as small, as light
such is my Heart's tear

Saturday, March 9, 2019

Dotted

Spring comes dotted of yellow, pink, red, white, fed by streaks of green.

Friday, March 8, 2019

En canta

Me encanta
Cantar

Direct

Direct breath groundwards,
Energy moves through the dense.
Direct breath skywards,
Energy moves through the light.

Tuesday, March 5, 2019

Our path

Our Path
Balance between
momentum and center

Curiosity

Curiosity fuels us.
What IS in this world?

Exquisite

Exquisite machines of choice
Are we

Deep reservoirs and riverbeds of energy
through which we project and dance
the shapes we will

Share

We share a world of colors

Faint

The faint light indigo of the morning sky.
It moves me
It bathes me
Inside

Thursday, February 21, 2019

Tuesday, February 19, 2019

Meet

We meet. Energy, excitement upon meeting.
We diverge. Longing, energy dispersal upon divergence.

Thursday, January 31, 2019

Wednesday, January 30, 2019

Expand

May our intention expand to fill our space.

Other things do, otherwise, like distractions.

Breath pulses thus.

Thursday, January 17, 2019

Multi

Fluctuate across dimensions. Intensity, span, speed. Energy, space, time. Each with its amplitude, frequency, flair.

Fullness

Seeking fullness in a field of maybes can be tiring.

Tuesday, January 8, 2019

Naked

Naked trees, sleeping trees, quiver softly under a grey blue sky. Ten thousand wooden fingers, painting in empty space. Ten thousand strands of lightning, from root to cold twig.

Friday, December 28, 2018

preservation

preservation of a form
is sometimes stretched
past its graceful end date

the form is sand
essence continues

Sunday, December 23, 2018

Unrequition

Explicit unrequition can feel heavy on the soul,
yet it flows, unlike unexpressed intention.

Thursday, December 13, 2018

Grateful

I feel grateful to the sun and the Earth. They give their energy to me.
I feel grateful to my teachers, from whom I've learned the art of discernment. The joy of perception.
I feel grateful to my body, my being. Through it I feel my world, my experience, my center.

Tuesday, November 27, 2018

Am

I am what is happening

Delights

Wave of being
Delights in
exploring new pathways
above below and beyond
finds secret tunnels within its form
In fluid allowance, it feels joy by the friction
Of the self with itself
Of erosion of walls, edges, thorns
Of the smoothing of the self
Cleansing of our arena
From unkempt brush to dance floor
Where we surf, flow, squeeze, fly

Being love and joy
Feeling ourselves full
Free

Saturday, November 24, 2018

Saturday, November 17, 2018

Hidra

Un triángulo naranja
Una ola de agua
Una columna de aire respirante
Una llama
Un vórtice de vacío
Un cuarzo irregular
Un rayo de luz

Thursday, November 15, 2018

Emptying

Upon emptying, feed on wholesome newness, made holy by an intention aware and true.
Otherwise, it feeds unawarely with the shape of our recent patterns, left as echo from our hollow shape.

Monday, November 12, 2018

Energy surfers

Energy surfers
May we find stillness in the surfing
May we surf in balance with us

Wednesday, November 7, 2018

Align

In the nick of time
This path proceeds to align
As it does
Every
Now
And
Now

Saturday, October 20, 2018

The flavor of care

Light comes to where there is care. The flavor of care changes with its color.

Friday, October 19, 2018

balloon

inhale inflates the balloon. bonds tense and are highlighted, sensation rises within we become aware of what they are. where they are. they poke and pull.
exhale brings deflation. relaxes bonds, soothes tense skin. reminds us we are still here

Thursday, October 18, 2018

Saturday, October 6, 2018

Thursday, October 4, 2018

Rage

A formless blob of rage, held in check by a proficient controller, keenly aware of societal boundaries. Pulled back again and again from its dream explosion, it lies waiting in its bloated chamber, brimming to the top, sphincters tight shut so often they are dry, rigid, unsure if they remember how to release. They only acquiesce to trickling sadness, enough to relieve pressure. Just enough. Inside the chamber, the old liquid continues to stagnate and rot.

Wednesday, October 3, 2018

Silent

Silent words block my throat.
Materialized in obscurity, they are deferred the responsibility of expression
From the body
To these
words

Hide

I tire of it because I hide it.

Thursday, September 20, 2018

Tired

Tired of these roles.
Tired of her defensiveness
Evasions
Coyness
Expectation of action
Retreat
Fear of advances
Fear of ulteriors
Tired of my hunting
Seeking
Impressing
Gambling
Offering
Hoping
Expectation of reception
Attacks
Fear of producing fear
Fear of rejection
Fear of opening up and noticing she does not want to
Tired of these
Roles

Together

Moon and lightning

Voluble

Voluble direction

Tuesday, September 18, 2018

wisp

at times I strive to build like a tree does
at times to float like a wisp

Thursday, August 30, 2018

Thursday, August 2, 2018

Monday, July 9, 2018

Active

The active mode changes the State of the world from one to another.
The contemplative mode observes. Feels.

Thursday, June 7, 2018

chosen

The chosen is the true

chaos

So I prefer from chaos to order rather than from border to border.
There is only here. There is only now.
From dream

only

The only time you can get something is when you want it.
Dream

Monday, April 30, 2018

Still

I saw a rainbow spectrum on a wall, and I liked it. I wanted to see it, and to find where it was coming from. As I was approaching it, it disappeared, and I was unable to find it anymore.

Then I realized that the colors were still there. Whether I saw them or not, the vibrant colors are still in the light of everything I see. I felt joy within and continued.

Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Friday, March 23, 2018

coins

oh how we seek
continuity
grace
elegance
purpose
reason
validation
recognition
success

seeking to flip endless coins and only get heads.

Friday, December 22, 2017

Thursday, December 21, 2017

Water

Water brings smooth
Smooth uniforms texture
Through smooth light shows clear
water allows

Friday, November 17, 2017

Monday, July 3, 2017

Cheeky

The moon glances at me tonight, with a cheeky shine.
"You're still here", she says.
Thank you, moon :)

Monday, June 26, 2017

Thursday, June 15, 2017

Collapse

Like sometimes, when libido strikes
The world collapses into a line
Between the extremes of getting laid or not

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

Sunday, June 11, 2017

Monday, May 22, 2017

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Sunday, May 7, 2017

Social Friction

At my Adobe internship, my desk is located on the Southeast corner of the third floor, as shown on this floor sketch:

*(which was never drawn)*.

During the day, I take occasional journeys to the...

*(5 years later)*...

snack bar, where I get coffee, water, and snacks. On my way back, I've found two competing alternative paths. One is composed of four straight segments connected by straight angles, simple and shorter. The other one traverses ~ten smaller such segments, and makes its way through a simple maze of cubicles that one feels is not the shorter path 

Yet I tend to prefer the second path. Why? Because the first one, on its last segment, walks right past 10 other interns in the same research area as me, and we tend to exchange awkward and forces smiles that I feel I'm pushing through as I walk there. I feel it takes more energy for me to walk that path than to walk a slightly longer distance and turn on my path left and right in an arbitrary sequence.

This leads me to state that there is such a thing as Social Friction. A force that resists movement along a path by repelling behavior (to the mover/observer) exhibited by societal members placed close to this path.

Saturday, May 6, 2017

Ashtanga Yoga Sequence

1. Stand, inhale & rise hands, exhale & hands down to chest.
2. 5 consecutive vinyasa sequences, each ending in standing hands to chest.
3. 5 consecutive vinyasa sequences, each ending in chair pose.
4. vinyasa sequence, ending in left/right leg to the front, warrior 1 pose.
5a. stand feet touching, lower, grab toes. go downwards, bend elbows.
5b. stand feet touching, lower, grab bottom of feet. go downwards, bend elbows.
6a. Triangle. right leg to the side, front foot forwards, back foot mostly forward. Extend arms, lower towards front, reaching out and down.
6b. Turn and repeat with other side.
7a. Twisted triangle. Right leg front, same position. Extend arms, front arm to the back, other arm up, then lower body along with arm, inside/outside legs. Other arm extends up, and twist the body in that direction.
7b. Turn and repeat with other side.
8a. Feet as in warrior 2. Front elbow rests on front knee, back arm extends, makes straight line together with back leg. Option to lower front arm to the ground.
8b. Turn and repeat with other side.
9a. Open legs wide, heels wider than toes. Hands to hips, legs straight, lower to hips. Hands to ground, lower head to ground.
9b. Rise to hips, hands on core, lower head again.
9c. Rise to hips, hands clasped behind back, lower head again.
10a. Reverse namaste (namaste behind the back). Position like twisted triangle, and lower head to knee/floor?.
10b. Turn and repeat with other side.
11a. Parahanmistasana. Stand hip width apart. Hold knee to chest, OR grab toe with same side arm and extend OR bow head to extended leg. Other hand holds the core. Hold.
11b. Rotate raised knee/extended leg to the side. Other hand remains holding the core. Hold.
11c. Leg back to front, release knee/toe. Stand up straight, hands to core, outstretch leg and foot high. Hold.
12. Sit with legs straight, back straight, hands on floor, head down to chest. Hold.
13a. One foot to the other thigh. Grab other foot’s toe with both hands, head down to chest. Hold. Then same, grabbing back of foot instead of toes.
13b. Same, but sitting on ankle instead of foot on thigh. Then a&b other side.
14a. Bend knee, foot on ground, align outer foot with outer hip. Extend same-side arm to left of knee, wrap around and to the back. Other arm stretches back to meet it, and they bind. Back straight, then head down towards the floor.
14b. Repeat with other side.
15a. Bend knee, align outer foot with outer hip. Option 1: Opposite arm wraps in front of knee to the back of the body, other arm is placed to the back of the body, helping to twist rotation towards the back. Body twists. Hold. Option 2: Opposite arm wraps between knee and chest, then to the other side to the back. Other arm stretches to the back on its side to meet it, and bind. Hold.
15b. Repeat with other side.
16. Navasana, boat pose. 3 times. Lay down. Then raise chest straight, raise legs straight, feet outstretched, arms outstretched towards feet. Hold five breaths. In between each pose, place hands to the front, place one shin over another, and lift body.
17a. Fish pose. Legs stretched or in lotus. Lay head back onto floor, back arched upwards, engage core, keep legs down. Hands clasped together under back. Hold.
17b. Stretch legs up and outward, feet outstretched, stretch arms out in the same direction. Hold.
18. Butterfly sit. Sit in butterfly pose, feet touching and closest to body, knees towards ground. Hands on feet, pushing insides of feet downwards so that only outsides of feet are touching. Head also pushes downwards. Hold.
19. Crow.
20. Back bends (3-5). Option 1: Bridge, feet on ground, shoulders and elbows on ground, top of head on ground. Rest of the body is arched upwards. Hands clasped underneath. Hold. Option 2: Full wheel: Instead of shoulders and head on floor, hands on floor, and the rest of the body arches upwards. Hold.
21. Shoulder stand.
22. Plow.
23. Wheel.
24. Headstand.
25. Lay.

Saturday, March 18, 2017

Thresholds

so ("so cute")
too ("too high")
enough ("enough sleep")
need ("need food")

A target threshold - a quantity or state - is required for expressions with either of these words to be well-defined.

Do

Dance Life

Sand

Cosmic sand

Monday, March 13, 2017

Path

Path is determined stream of moments, events, steps, co-occurrent instances of something. And they serve to reach a place, a goal, a state, quickly and reliably. State-arrivers.

Paths are learned during growth, societal adoption. Communication, clothing, skills, usage of body.

Societal paths are sparse. Space of possibility is ample. To savor it, explore.

Awareness

Awareness begets Intention.
Intention is Life.
Experience is Learning.
Intent experience is guided Learning.
Justifications made out of smoke.
Every act is a choice.
Conditioning is congealed choice.
Intercongealed concepts may obstruct Flow.

Monday, January 23, 2017

Thursday, October 6, 2016

Music Malleates

Piano music feels like water, waving, streaming, and soothing. When soft, it touches and envelops the sensations and the soul. When strong, it shows itself as a wave washing it with a smooth force. A staccato feels like little bursts rising from the surface. A legato feels like ripples upon the surface dancing to their own spirit. In general, piano music slides on the skin and leaves fading traces of resonance where it has touched. It caresses and envelops, it rides the listener in waves.

Violin music feels like a wooden dagger. A single note can already stab the emotions deep. It does not harm; it penetrates. It opens new channels among the unexplored, letting air and sunshine breathe into them. It pierces crusts into the sensitive emotions long ignored and/or forgotten, and helps one feel what is there. Like a toothpick piercing play dough, it finds the colors hidden inside and allows them to be felt by the light surface again. It helps us remember we can reshape ourselves, our intentions, by feeling our emotions in different shapes and patterns.

Soothing surface.
Digging deep.

Feel.

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Share

Many moments I feel there's no one around to share with, and I feel lonely. I forget how rich my world is. This night, I will share with you: Moon. Air. Trees. Breath.

Monday, August 22, 2016

Viagra

Lsd. Like Viagra, for consciousness.
And like Teflon! Unsticking agent, detaches the cat from being that got stuck onto the windshield.

Monday, August 15, 2016

Thursday, July 7, 2016

Wane

Why weep when we wane?
Waves wash wilts well, while will whispers wishes within world.

Monday, May 30, 2016

Be

We gotta be. There's no way around it. Buy while we're at it, we might as well give it our All.

Saturday, April 23, 2016

Legacies

Ambiguity and lackluster purposes are time-tested legacies that people continue to perpetuate.

Friday, January 8, 2016

Estoy

En este mundo, entre bombas gigantescas, destrucción errática, buses citadinos regulares, restricciones veneradas, perspectivas inigualables, margaritas delicadas, esporas felices, ocio inexhaustible, economías fluctuantes, matemáticas inmutables, confusiones frívolas, sentimientos bioquímicos, magias intangibles, fervores colectivos, altruismos artificiales, glorias nocivas, pulsaciones ultradimensionales, vastedades desconocidas, sutilezas inefables, temores secretos, gobiernos pendulares, tiempo inexorable, propósitos efímeros, esencias de jojoba, sinfonías simultáneas, silencios apurados, gigantes esferas gráciles, bellezas desintentadas, orificios geográficos, naturalezas regulares, balances invisibles, crecimientos exponenciales, homomorfismos infinitos, paradojas verdaderas, decisiones continuas, restricciones auto-impuestas, estereotipos acertados, suposiciones obsoletas, lógica persistente, logística inevitable, esfuerzos absolutos, menguas constantes, búsquedas ortogonales, éxitos inconsecuentes, legados culturales, lenguajes convergentes, colores incrustados, proporciones auditivas, topologías neurales, jerarquías aceptadas, helicópteros diminutos, chocolates cremosos, ideas olvidadas, cariños inequívocos, abundancia desechada, necesidades ilusorias, amor mítico, conciencia absoluta, gases libres, aire fresco,
Estoy.

Saturday, May 30, 2015

Citas del Gita

"No hacer lo correcto cuando se lo requiere es peor que hacer lo incorrecto. "

"El deseo de recoger los frutos de las propias acciones genera preocupación por el fracaso, y esto da por resultado la mente vacilante de la que antes te hablé. Preocupado por los frutos de tus obras, te evadirás del presente hacia un futuro imaginario y por lo general temible. Entonces tu ansiedad te privará de energía y, para agravar aún más las cosas, caerás en la inacción y la pereza."

"¡Ningún objetivo se logra, ohhh guerrero, en el futuro!"

Saturday, April 25, 2015

Friday, April 24, 2015

Retarded

Emotionally retarded.
One day I realized it.
Been trying to catch up since.

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Signposts

Words are not of the essence.
When they try to capture essence,
they fail.
All essence is ephemeral,
and words describe states,
in which no essence can reside.

But they can make good signposts.

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Child

Perennially lost child.

Insomniac

To the anxious, thirsty heart,
sleep is a needless distraction.
Insomniac, it languishes in desperate inaction,
gasps alone for connection,
and sorely misses its powerful will to act.

Congealed

Congealed loneliness is easily ignored.
But when it is noticed, it sticks around the heart like amber on an insect.

Thursday, April 16, 2015

Thursday, April 9, 2015

Monday, March 23, 2015

Pestañazos

Quiero dormirme entre pestañazos de nuestras conversaciones, ojo a ojo, boca a boca.

Monday, March 16, 2015

Thursday, March 5, 2015

EigenFlow

Enjoy the flux around you.
Melt into it if you will.
Yet keep the feel and know of
Your Own Flow.

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Productivity

Slurring, dripping, sluggish, congealed, indifferent productivity.

xkcd

"How about we get a nice XKCD... thing" (as a proposal to decorate the cube space wall).... :-/
...sad?

Intender

I find the meanings of "querer" and "desear" too lacking in their "intentfulness", and too attached to "desire" to emphasize on their "volition". And "intentar" has too tentative a connotation. Hence, I propose:

Intender: v. El acto de decidir y/o iniciar alguna acción.
  • Tiempos simples (Presente/Pasado/Futuro):
    • [Yo] intiendo/intendí/intenderé.
    • [Tú] intiendes/intendiste/intenderás.
    • [Él] intiende/intendió/intenderá.
    • [Ella] intiende/intendió/intenderá.
    • [Eso] intiende/intendió/intenderá.
    • [Usted] intiende/intendió/intenderá.
    • [Ellos] intienden/intendieron/intenderán.
    • [Ellas] intienden/intendieron/intenderán.
    • [Nosotros] intendemos/intendimos/intenderemos.
    • [Vosotros] intendéis/intendisteis/intendiréis.
  • Pretérito imperfecto (En esos tiempos que...)
    • [Yo/Él/Ella/Eso/Usted] intendía.
    • [Tú] intendías.
    • [Ellos/Ellas] intendían.
    • [Nosotros] intendíamos.
    • [Vosotros] intendíais.
  • Subjuntivo presente (Es posible que...):
    • [Yo/Él/Ella/Eso/Usted] intienda.
    • [Tú] intiendas.
    • [Ellos/Ellas] intiendan.
    • [Nosotros] intendiemos.
    • [Vosotros] intendiéis.
  • Subjuntivo pretérito imperfecto (En el caso que...):
    • [Yo/Él/Ella/Eso/Usted] intendiera/intendiese,
    • [Tú] intendieras/intendieses,
    • [Ellos/Ellas] intendieran/intendiesen,
    • [Nosotros] intendiéramos/intendiésemos,
    • [Vosotros] intendiérais/intendiéseis,
  • Condicional (Entonces...):
    • [Yo/Él/Ella/Eso/Usted] intendría.
    • [Tú] intendrías.
    • [Ellos/Ellas] intendrían.
    • [Nosotros] intendríamos.
    • [Vosotros] intendríais.
  • Subjuntivo futuro (Si mañana...):
    • [Yo/Él/Ella/Eso/Usted] intendiere,
    • [Tú] intendieres,
    • [Ellos/Ellas] intendieren,
    • [Nosotros] intendiéremos,
    • [Vosotros] intendiéreis,
  • Imperativo:
    • [Tú] Intiende!
    • [Vos] Intendé!
    • [Usted] Intienda!
    • [Nosotros] Intendamos!
    • [Vosotros] Intended!
    • [Ustedes] Intiendan!
  • Participio:
    • Intendido.
  • Gerundio:
    • Intendiendo.

Saturday, December 27, 2014

Apathy

I suspect strong discoverers and achievers often underestimate human apathy.

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Stray

Thoughts of one next to death,
Power of a windstorm,
Drive of a floating leaf.
A stray hunter who forgot his prey.
Thus I feel.

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Distraction

I just realized why I prefer being busy so much. It distracts me from the dark, sad, empty part of me that has been tired with life since long ago.

Friday, August 22, 2014

Friday, July 18, 2014

Sunday, June 8, 2014

Beauty

Beauty is a right of the living, a privilege of the conscious, and a duty to our own happiness. And being beautiful is being our utmost best. And our best is defined, created, discovered even, by each of us. And the fact that we can decide how and when to apply our intentions of beauty is a wonderful and lovely truth.

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Dolls

It just dawned on me that I'm only a player in a game of role - surrounded by other players, and, well... just moving ahead and living it up! So much to do, so much color!

We are such funny dolls, walking around like we're so important :)

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Ondulates

The sea just ondulates... up and down, up and down. It vibrates calmly, pacedly, like a sinuous, seemingly chaotic 2D function gently waving itself back and forth, back and forth, up and down, up and down. Its crashes on the beach are just its effect at the boundaries. Like DCT. One of Earth's principal vibrations, or signals, it'd seem. What to learn from it?

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Mi vida


(Written long ago, c. 2006-2007)

Mi vida - mi regalo, mi jaula, mi mundo.

Gallos en la madrugada

(Aparentemente, escrito el 25 de julio del 2007)

Todos los animales - pájaros, gallos, perros, se levantan y gritan en la madrugada... están felices por la aproximación del nuevo dÌa. Si las personas nos levantáramos con tal ánimo como para gritar junto con los gallos en la madrugada, qué mundo tan diferente sería éste.

Prayer

(Written on March 31, 2011, 19:31)

prayers like affirmations
praise is good because it gives the correct attitude (being enveloped in a world in which one is privileged to be ABLE to praise)

Linear text

(Written in Pittsburgh, c. 2012?)

Extend past linear text

Meat

(Written c. December 12, 2012, 07:30)

If we think of a computer as simply a magical metal box it is maybe the same as considering our bodies as simply a conglomerate of skin, bones, and meat.

Buoyant

(Written on March 24th, 2013)

I grasped at it like the last piece of wood in the sea,
but I had not realized that I was buoyant myself.

Gmail's Fate

(Written years ago, perhaps even before Pittsburgh)

GMail will disappear in 2023.

Pathways

(Written sometime in Pittsburgh, probably in early 2012)

Simultaneous neural pathways.
Of them be aware, and learn to discern and prune.

2^n by hand

(Calculated in high school, typed up in October 22nd, 2006)

325 - 68351585149469122636640694597425667667286544715412888638305245550965111224980497600734786781970432

360 - 2348628482119753227889480596789337027375682548908319870707288020053157231586349883463698998384768903031934976

Woman

(Written c. June 12, 2006)

The body of a woman is so very appealing. What's more appealing? The image of the body itself, the afterthoughts of pleasure it provokes, or the forbidden, taboo tag stamped all over it?

Unobserved

(Written years ago in Pittsburgh)

One cannot learn the unobserved.

Pre-packaged

(Written years ago in Pittsburgh on a piece of paper, but typed until March 9th, 2013)

I reject pre-determined success and failure. Pre-packaged. Stale.

Silent comparison

(Written in Apr 3rd, 2011)

People think they know more than others, or less than others. In the former case, they silence in contempt, in the latter case in shame. Modern conglomerated society.

Thursday, January 9, 2014

Fly

fly flow flew

Precioso

es todouna ficcion. mi vida es toda una ficcion. En cada punto pienso y vienen otros pensamientos, distintos, incompatibles con antes. Pero nuevos, y mi ficcion de ahora shines con pasion y voluntad.

Pero es una ficcion. Y reconocerlo me ayuda a ver que
que todo esta bien
que todo lo que hago esta bien. Me merezco actuar con decision y voluntad, y agradezco a mi corazon que me ha dilucidado este secreto precioso.

Monday, December 16, 2013

Bold

Bold. Be bold. Be of bold spirit and strong heart, and pure mind.
(Nov 2013)

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Barrel

I'm used to scratching the bottom of the barrel. I enjoy it, and make myself enjoy it, by telling myself I'm part of the minority, and that just filling up the barrel is 1) wasteful, 2) not much of a challenge. And I just think... then what's the big barrel for?

Friday, October 18, 2013

Exotic

The exotic does not always bring excitement,
nor routine boredom.

Monday, September 2, 2013

MeThinks

(Written sometime in Aug/Sep 2013)
Not free while there are still urges in me.
______________________________
At my age, others have already married, had kids, started companies, set on a stable career...
Yes. And I have done neither of these.
So what does that make me?
Me.

Rewarded

(Written sometime in Aug/Sep 2013)
Do I expect to be rewarded because I look at the clouds?

Saturday, August 24, 2013

Basics

Perception inherits existence.
Consciousness inherits choice.
(Aug 24, 2013)

Sunday, July 21, 2013

Moonlight

Moonlight alone illumines my path
as I venture my way back home
just enough blue pale to make out the trail
but I trust it as I aimless roam.

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Virtuous Idyll

Bathe in the waters of Peace, dry with the wind of Freedom, bask in the light of Truth.

Sunday, May 26, 2013

Why write?

Why write? Well, I had things to say and no one to say them to, so I made pen, paper, and keyboard my friends.

Friday, May 24, 2013

as if

Act as if you'll never remember it.

[Rediscovered on May 24, 2020)

Best

In this world, there is nothing forever hidden. Everything exists, affects, sprouts, influences, creates, expands. Every single molecule is. Every single person is. And we do our best. What else? If it weren't our best, we wouldn't choose it.
~Oct 16, 2011

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Digestion

Food slows thought
Milk dulls the mind
~Jan'12

Codependency

People hang on to others desperately, they communicate with them, seek them out, attempting to find in them some comparison, some approval, some judgement, some reference, because often they are scared to give these to themselves. Or have simply entirely forgotten. Likely both.
So much energy wasted socially. Trying to impress, to stand out, to be noticed.
~Jan'12

Prayer Measurement

Too often do religious-claimed people measure success of their prayer through material effects.
~Jan'12

Proporción

Juicio:Precio::D#:E
Fall 2011 or ~Jan'12

Monday, May 13, 2013

Al pasar

Disfruto la vida al pasar
O quiero disfrutarla y me lo imagino?
O alterno entre ambas?
Ser.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Praise of the Self

Our bodies are such subtle actors
Our minds, unharnessed crafters of the abstract
Our hearts, engines that turn emotions into willpower
And other parts of us, that I don't know to describe, sublime and miraculous, like currents of air throughout it all whose nature is to keep balance between the parts.

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Decisions

Is breadth-first search appropriate for real-time decision making?

Monday, April 22, 2013

That lantern in the sky

That lantern in the sky
Kindles the whole of our lives
I delight in its twilight oblique rays that
Produce that colored light show in the sky.

Every day
And every night
At twilight

Sunday, April 21, 2013

White

In the lapse of a day or so,
white has outside replaced green.
I knew not that Sky was so keen
on shedding its newly acquired snow.

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Spring Birds

Today birds are chatting like excited schoolgirls, in the seeming apex of Spring.

Monday, April 8, 2013

Regularizer

I think often people set too high a coefficient on their financial regularizer term.

(Written sometime in Fall 2012)

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Sunday, March 24, 2013

STD

Statistics rarely makes me think of sex, and then I calculate standard deviations in MATLAB.

Sunday, March 10, 2013

The color of time

minutes are blue.
seconds are yellow.
hours are red.

Training tip on Neural Networks

(c. early 2013)

Iteratively put more detail when training:
Represent a low approximation, and train.
Given the best solution there, now approximate the function with a bit more detail, and repeat, starting at the point of the best solution given in the last iteration.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Monkey

I'm the stupid monkey with his hand trapped through the hole, unwilling to unfist the piece of fruit.

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Resignation

Time wastes away in ardent frustration, akin to rules of the useless, wondering if following unbelieved rules is worth sacrificing potential passion.
(Written sometime in Fall 2012)

Right

The right to change is perennial.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Multicast

When one addresses a crowd successfully, one is likely attending oneself foremost, as it is probably hard to attend everyone being addressed to. One is speaking one's own truth, and the manner in which the receptors take it is left to the receptors' choice.

Addressing a single person successfully, however, can be made attending either oneself's or the other's needs. Focusing one's entire attention on a person can make them feel listened to, attended, important. This is my experience.

Friday, February 22, 2013

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Shy

Shy intentions are no good. They're like slow internet. You might be better off not counting on it at all.

Monday, November 19, 2012

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Tedious


Research is tedious.

Writing in LaTeX is boring, tedious, and requires a great deal of unnecessary work.
Research software is faulty, badly-designed, rarely well-documented if at all, and non-standard.
I despise spending 90% of my time tackling ridiculously intranscendent issues. I hate not finding the time to improve upon such small issues that would make such a great improvement for researchers in general.

I hate the attitude of researchers who have accepted that these tools are the standard way to go about it, and do nothing to improve their situation, and just grunge their way through years and years of tedious-and-worthless effort, interleaved between huge gaps of naturally-induced-procrastination, an amount of sleep almost minimally required to survive and appear healthy, and whatever specks of time remain used on sloppily-focused, bursty grasps at what might turn out to be useful. I hate it.

That is why research, in the version I have observed and experienced it, sucks.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Equivalent

(Written on Nov 6, 2012, 10:24)

Can be expressed in terms of possibilities, or in terms of constraints.

Friday, October 26, 2012

Extremes

Consider extremes while exploring. It is through extremes that we most successfully characterize shapes in the physical world, and we're pretty good at that, if I may say so. If extremes are not considered, everything might seem like just one big blob.

Convex

In any convex differentiable function, the set of points at which the gradient takes on a value M must be convex. If stricly convex, each of these sets is unary.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Busy

The busy one ignores passing beauty.

Unpleasant

Living a life of borrowed goods and pressing goals, always having what is not mine and always owing what I don't have. Unpleasant.

Admiration

Admiration fakely enjoyed leaks out one's throat. A never-ending pattern of accepting the "undeserved". Or the "unwanted"?

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Mordor

"My computer is like Mordor"
Apurv

Update:
"There is strange code lurking inside"

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Simultaneous

Are simultaneous events independent of each other given the actual state of the world? If they are, then we are indeed only members of the world. If they are not, then we are integrated into it.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Corrientes

Corrientes del presente, ascendentes e independientes, rara vez son reincidentes.

Unbridled (Apr 20, 2012 21:09)

Budding minds learn best in unbridled environments.

Camera ratio

The ratio of camera-ready users among my online Google contacts is 31/53. That's more than half. My social context's videocam regular usage has achieved 50%. Rad.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Iterative

We find someone to merge with and reinforce, to jot change endlessly, but to converge into compatible structures that reinforce each other, much like the hubs and authorities of Larry & Sergey's Pagerank algorithm. Support, to have something to act upon, to stop exploring endlessly and morphing over and over. To explore, suffer changes through mutual adjustments, disagreements, iterations,...
to converge upon a structure that supports itself, that iterates upon its two halves to grow and learn in a rooted fashion.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Context Momentum

Term:
  1. A variable related to multi-tasking: the asset of being actively involved in a particular context (conversation, project, or other activity), which often enhances one's effectiveness at this activity.
  2. An often-ignored concept regarding one's current involvement.
  3. The combination of factors that allow an activity to be considered "on-going", most often preceded by an overhead readying process.
  4. A resource found in "active" states, most commonly used to refer to the psychological set of factors that allow a person to do what he is doing as he does.

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Diagonals

When I see an object, I often mentally draw lines, most often straight, between non-adjacent vertices of it. A table, a cup, a window, a car, the corners of a dog's head, the borders of a lush tree. The corners of someone's eyes, the nose bridge to the nose tip, the tip to the cheek ridge, the top of the lip to the side, the top of the ear to the bottom, the hair forefront to the back of the head. I imagine this helps me calculate the sizes and internal ratios of objects, although it is exaggerated to conscious proportions. I wonder if I can make it fully unconscious again.

This phenomenon constantly distracts me from whatever I'm doing, and introduces considerable overhead into my thoughts. I first noticed this behavior in high school, and I think I've only now expressed it at all.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Electrical Interference

Did you know that charging my iPhone 3GS disrupts its audio output? It does. Very much.

Friday, August 10, 2012

Desires

Unsatisfied desires leave empty husks behind.

Friends

Friends regulate social anxiety. They provide further evidence beyond one to evaluate oneself.

Friday, August 3, 2012

Competition

Competition too often agglomerates everyone's happiness, and gives it away as the prize. Seems to me like a principal cause of power laws and "rich gets richer" phenomenon.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Definition

Definition requires constraints. Things are also through what they are not.
What then, if you want to be everything? Shed definition.

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Google Shortcuts

Google, please implement convenient keyboard shortcuts for services such as YouTube, Google Play, and your omnipresent Web Search, as you so wisely have for Gmail and Google Docs. And please make these shortcuts consistent across products whenever possible.

Sincerely,
Google User

Midwest

Chicago is not midwest. If anything, it's mideast. Colorado is midwest.

Friday, June 29, 2012

Template

I am he that came before me, and also he who is yet to come. One instance of the same template.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Space and Drive


There is what one can and what one wants. One is the space, the other serves as the drive. But sometimes the want, like horses pulling your carriage, can........... run out of control. An inner, guiding principle, or a destination, can then provide the will and temperance to retake control.

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Sunday, June 10, 2012

No words

No words
but heart aches
and tongue shakes with anticipation
of saying what has no words.

Plans cross
paths meet
times shared
dreams shared
joy scattered
in fast memories
and yet long
rich with chance and adventure
A bright gem of experience
belongs not to one but to both
inseparable
inextricable
We fuse in time indelible.

Then time shifts
the fork in the road nears
and joy slopes into longing
the future longing of the bright past
inevitable

Saturday, June 9, 2012

Friday, June 8, 2012

Firefly

Thoughts are like a firefly's twinkle.
Some of them are seen.
The rest, no one will know of them.

Peace

A blank mind finds peace.

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Here in Tibet

Flies deliberately dance with each other, they interact, stop and observe, and act again, with strong intention.

The sky is brighter and bluer than anywhere else I've seen.

Flowers bloom at over 3.3km of altitude.

People are truthful and forthcoming.

Tsampa has a most amazing consistency.

Ravens have yellow beaks.

One species of bird flies over the flat grasslands, hovers, flaps its wings, and chirps ultra-excitedly and continuously, announcing its excitement to everyone else in the grassland. Seems crazy, and is amazing.

Sunset begins with a white pure light, and paints a beautiful journey of colors and angles with the horizon clouds through creamy white, creamy yellow, denser yellow, light orange, heavy orange, and finally grey.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Relativity

Things are only as in their relation to others.
Water is at the lake as much as sand is in the desert.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Curtains


An action, a single concept, projectable onto many distinct contexts and emotions.

Curtains sway gently.

Scenario 1: A quiet sleeper train, a muffled engine sound in the background, a snore here and there.

Scenario 2: An unmoving sleeper train, more dimly lit, and not a sound around, only the silent, unwarranted waving of the curtains.

Scenario 3: An unmoving sleeper train, more dimly lit, and not a sound around, only the silent, unwarranted waving of the curtains. You know that behind the closest curtain waits for you a lovely traveler you just met, brushing her soft legs together in anticipation of the meeting of your skins.

No one knows what you know. Be free to inform others.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Eagle

Brave eagle
Glides through a vast ocean
So many places to fly
but is brave to choose only one.

Monday, May 14, 2012

Raw

Raw wild energy is not to be repressed, but guided.

Oak

Under a seeing-eye mighty oak*,
a refuge from rain I sought
a great umbrella of purplish hues
generous with protection

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Neutered

Neutered for so long
forgotten how to effect
pawing, stumbling, grabbing
at whatever helps me remember.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Substitute

Sex is a cheap substitute in a world scarce of affection. One craves the latter, only finds the former, and accepts it as the medication. Much like appeasing hunger with sugar.

Saturday, March 31, 2012

Soy

Hijo de mi Fortuna
Pionero de mi Destino
Amo de la Primordial Decisión

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Soon Grade

asap < as soon as possible < very soon < soon < in a sec < in a lil while < in a while < later < ... sometime later < I dunno.

Monday, March 26, 2012

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Spring, Bloom

Blooming snow
Pastel dawn
Sprinkling sky
Shedding flowers
Petal blanket
Lilac trees
Sweetest pink
Fresh new green
Lovely scene

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Insólito

"Insólito" es una palabra sólita relativa a "Sólito", que es insólita.

http://etimologias.dechile.net/?inso.lito

Antónimos mutuamente descriptivos.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Friday, March 16, 2012

Spring, Birth

Snow precedes a clear sky.
The clear sky invites the sun.
The sun gifts us warmth.
Warmth brews rain and thunder.
Thunder beckons to green and to song.
New green is so bright.
Spring song, a soothing melody of Life.

Monday, February 20, 2012

Initial learning

With limited training data, a more constrained model tends to perform better.

Manning, et al. An Introduction to Information Retrieval. April 1, 2009. Cambridge University Press, Cambridge, England. p. 241

Magnets

We are selective magnets.
Our Focus directs our Force.

Monday, January 16, 2012

Friday, December 30, 2011

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Near Hit

I just realized I will never have a birthday when my age is the same as the calendar date.
For example, someone born on April 16th should turn 16 years old on April 16th. But that won't ever happen to me.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Ill-defined

Highly ambiguous superlative claims amuse me.

Indescribable

"Indescribable" is an inapplicable adjective.
"Inapplicable" is not.

Literally

"Literally"'s meaning is etymologically unsound. It is just like saying "letteredly".
I letteredly woke up at 3PM yesterday.

Structure

Societal structure harnesses the population's energy.
Have its goal be worthy, or dispose of it.